Project bullshit

I went to journalism school... and in journalism school, especially at Missouri, everyone was always working on something.

"So what are you working on?"

"A year and a half ago."

That's basically how it went. I know this because I've said something similar dozens of times... while in school, later to friends and family members, and now during my trips to NYC to meet with my editors and clients. I haven't spent much time in other journalism schools, but I'm relatively sure that they teach the same art of bullshit everywhere. This happens in orientation... way before the first day of class.

Here is a short list of projects that I've been "working on" previous to moving down to Miami in the beginning of 2006: Baptism and religion in America's South, the legacy of Tobacco in rural North Carolina, a long-term project on fatherhood, a long-term project on Superfund sites, a portrait essay on Day Laborers... I'll end it there because its already depressing enough.

So, after learning or otherwise becoming capable of trying to fool myself and anyone else who cared to listen while in college, its taken me a long time to beat the shit out of myself enough to wake up and focus my efforts. Part of it is just the natural process of becoming more mature and responsible about finding meaning in my life and work. Part of it is truly getting so sick over the images I desperately wanted to make, but didn't know how to start. A lot of it has been over coming my fears that I wouldn't be able to do well the kind of work that I deeply loved. But on the other side of all of the project bullshit I've heard and spoken, I'm now finally beginning to create a life for myself that is actually dedicated to doing the work I care the most about.

This year I've been able to push the needle somewhere closer to 50/50 (personal projects/work) for the first time, and to that end I'm currently in the middle of shooting more than a half-dozen major projects of various types. The results have been very slow in coming, but they are starting to build up, and I can already see the enormous peace and pleasure that I'll have created for myself on the other side of completing the work I've begun.

Tomorrow morning I'll be waking up early again and racing the dawn as I head North into the mouth of the Everglades to continue my project focusing on the River of Grass and the restoration of the 'Glades. Later this week I'll be writing the first of many posts discussing my interest in the project and my journey in trying to photograph a large and complex photography project.

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